Most of us would like a new car, a bigger house, a better paying job, or a successful business. Or maybe you would like to climb Mount Kilimanjaro or Mount Everest.
However, if the goal manifested miraculously without you having to work towards it, you wouldn’t be as happy or fulfilled. For example, imagine setting a goal to climb a mountain and then you’re instantly teleported to the top of the mountain. The feeling of achievement won’t be the same without working towards it.
Essentially, our goals are more than just things we want to have or achieve. There’s much more to it. You might think that you’d like to have a magic genie at your disposal. But it would be a lot less enjoyable than you think.
As we move into the last quarter of the year, those who haven’t given up on 2020 may be feeling the need to rush and work full blast on their goals. I know this feeling because I’m experiencing it. It’s also something I’m seeing in my clients as we work on making the last quarter of this year count.
What really makes you work on a goal?
1. If you could have everything you want just magically appear, would you find that satisfying?
If you’re like most people, you have a long list of things you’d like to be, do, and have.
Imagine you could just suddenly snap your fingers and be wealthy, play the piano, travel the world, lose those annoying 20kg, have a successful business, be married to the person of your dreams, and have three children.
Imagine that and ask yourself how that would feel. If what you really want is to simply have all those things, you’d jump at that deal. However, you probably aren’t that excited when it’s presented this way.
The process of achieving something might be more important to you. Growing a business, finding your perfect romantic partner, and figuring out how to become wealthy are part of the journey.
Things don’t mean as much if you don’t have to work for them.
2. How do you feel the day after completing a goal?
Think about a big goal you’ve achieved. It might be landing a particular job, passing your high school exams, graduating from college, or completing a huge project. How did you feel shortly after it was over?
I remember the first day after I left employment for good. I had looked forward to this day for 6 months as I worked through my notice period. While it was exhilarating to finally achieve that milestone, I also felt let down. It didn’t feel as great as I had expected!
Soon after your great success, you’ve also probably felt surprisingly blah about the whole matter. Why do you think this is?
3. Is it the struggle that matters to you?
Maybe the struggle is what appeals to you. Maybe it’s not winning, but putting in the time, sweat, and tears that makes it all worthwhile. Maybe it’s the thrill of overcoming a challenge. You don’t experience that when you don’t have to work for something.
4. Is it the personal growth that makes achieving goals satisfying?
Is having a successful business exciting? Or is it learning new skills, developing the perfect sales pitch, and becoming a new and improved version of yourself? To achieve a big goal, you must grow and develop yourself. Is this what really appeals to you?
5. Struggling leads to learning
Say someone gifts you a new car, just like that. While it may feel great, you’ve actually lost an opportunity to learn how to earn, save, and invest your money. Challenges force you to learn. You study, make mistakes and corrections. All these are forms of learning that leads to growth.
What motivates you?
Think about all the things you’ve achieved. Now, imagine all of those things are handed to you. How does that make you feel?
Would you still be the same person if you’d lost 20kg by waving a magic wand versus changing your diet and working hard at the gym?
What if your dream business landed on your lap, completely done? Would you feel motivated to work on it or grow it?
We get more from achieving goals than just the end result.
Our goals provide a way to grow. Goals provided a sense of accomplishment when they require work and effort to achieve. And as we set and accomplish our goals, our self-confidence and self-esteem also grows.
Having something handed to you is nice but delivers much less meaning. So, avoid wishing for good luck, no matter how hard this year has been. Instead, wish to be stronger and more determined to forge forward. Although achieving it is fantastic, the goal itself isn’t really the point!
(Image credit: Pexels)
